3rder platform survey of nearly 4,000 users reveals a measurable shift: more urban daters are choosing to explore first, commit never — and they’re doing it on explicit mutual terms
NEW YORK, June 2026 — When the New York Post recently spotlighted “Practice Dates” — the trend of New Yorkers going out with people they’re not even attracted to, just to rehearse the feeling of intimacy — it pointed to something bigger than a quirky habit. It pointed to a fundamental change in how a generation of urban daters relates to connection itself.
That change has a name: feel first, define later. And according to new behavioral data from 3rder, a social platform built for couples and throuple-curious singles, it is showing up in measurable ways — not just in one-on-one dating, but increasingly in Trio Dynamics, emotional and romantic connections involving three people.
What the Data Shows
Over a three-month period, 3rder surveyed 1,977 active Couples and 1,869 Singles on its platform who had expressed interest in Trio Dynamics. While this data reflects a self-selected community already open to non-traditional relationship structures — and is not representative of all NYC daters — the behavioral patterns are consistent and striking.
Key findings:
- l 73% of respondents said their desire to define a relationship quickly had noticeably declined compared to two years ago
- l 81% said they felt no need to label their connections — a preference shared across both Couples (83%) and Singles (78%)
- l 68% of Couples reported maintaining active, ambiguous connections with at least two Trio Dynamics-curious Singles per month; of those, 39% said these connections had been ongoing for more than two months with no pressure to define them
- l 53% of Singles were simultaneously connecting with more than five Couples; 47% of those described the experience as “completely natural, with no psychological pressure”
- l 74% of Couples and 63% of Singles said they were open to meeting in person before knowing where a connection was headed — provided both parties had agreed upfront on a no-strings framework
- l 62% said that staying deliberately ambiguous, within a framework of mutual consent, was itself an honest and fair way to engage
The defining feature across all of these interactions: explicit, upfront agreement. No hidden expectations. No obligation to commit. What 3rder calls “conscious curiosity.”
Why This Is Different from Open Relationships or Polyamory
This emerging model is not polyamory, and it is not a traditional open relationship. It is lighter. Less structured. Not oriented toward long-term emotional commitment or exclusivity of any kind.
What it does require — consistently, according to users — is transparency. Everyone knows. Everyone agrees. Nobody is kept in the dark.
“What we’ve noticed is that more and more users are having the ‘what are we both comfortable with’ conversation before anything even begins,” said Alicia, CEO of 3rder. “That’s not casual — that’s actually really mature. Everyone knows what they want, and everyone respects where the other person is coming from. We call this approach ‘conscious curiosity’ at 3rder.”
3RDER User’s Own Words
Couple, Brooklyn, both 28
Three years together, exploring Trio Dynamics for the past year. “We didn’t come to 3rder because something was wrong between us,” She says. “We were just curious about what else was out there.” The rule they hold to: no one is kept in the dark. “Honestly, the whole thing has been a kind of adventure for us — exploring together, experiencing new connections as a pair. It’s brought more energy into our relationship.”
Male user, Manhattan, 31
Active on 3rder for nearly a year. Maintains light emotional connections with two Couples. “I used to think dating meant finding ‘the one,’ and it felt like so much pressure. Then I realized I just wanted to meet different people and experience different kinds of connection.” His non-negotiable: “Consent is the foundation. Without that, nothing else matters.”
Bisexual female user, Queens, 26
Bisexual, currently in contact with one Couple and another Single — and everyone is aware of everyone. “I’m attracted to both men and women, so Trio Dynamics just feels natural to me. No one has to pretend. No one has to wait for a promise. Being able to enjoy all of this consciously and willingly — that’s the best feeling.”
The Bigger Picture
The parallel between the Practice Dates trend and 3rder’s platform data is not a coincidence — it is a signal.
Across different relationship formats, a similar underlying logic is emerging among a segment of urban daters: reduce pressure, increase transparency, and let connections develop without forcing them into predefined categories. Ambiguity, in this model, is not confusion. It is a deliberate, consensual choice.
“We’re not saying everyone should do this,” said Alicia. “What 3rder is here to do is give people who are already drawn to this kind of exploration a safe, transparent, pressure-free space to do it. Everyone has different needs when it comes to intimacy — we just want every kind of choice to be respected.”
Methodology Note
Data cited in this release comes from a 3rder internal behavioral survey conducted over three months (Q1–Q2 2026) among 1,977 active Couples and 1,869 active Singles on the platform who had expressed interest in Trio Dynamics. Respondents represent a self-selected community of users already open to non-traditional relationship structures. Findings are not statistically representative of the broader NYC or U.S. dating population.
About 3rder
3rder is a social platform designed for couples and throuple-curious singles, providing a safe, open, and pressure-free space to explore non-traditional relationship dynamics. The platform is built on a foundation of explicit consent, transparency, and mutual respect.
Media Contact
Website: www.3rder.com
Email: Support@3rder.com